Heres the secret truth, and even though posting it on the internet doesn’t make it a secret anymore it’s still something I burry deep down inside and pretend not to believe it to be true.
The truth is, I’m deeply afraid of change.
I put on a brave face and act like Im excited for new things, new places, new friends, new coffee shops and new paths in life. But cold hard truth, it scares the living bejeezus out of me. So in the beginning of the year when my partner and I made the decision to relocate to Seattle, I put on the ultimate face. I told everyone how excited I was to challenge myself in my photography career, and how stoked I was to be in a big city, and I couldn’t wait for it to rain all the time because, “I loooove the rain.” Okay that last one wasn’t quite a lie, I do love the rain. But this Seattle-fog-fake-rain but always raining thing is a new kind of rain I was not actually prepared for.. But the point is, I was not prepared. Nor was I ready to uproot my life, my business that I had spent the last year working overtime building from scratch that and was finally starting to pick up, and join my little family on a plane with our four checked bags and a fresh start.
But here’s I am, four months into this journey; and Im here to say to people of the internet who probably won’t even be read this, I could be more happy I did it. I’ve made some really great friends already, I have almost fully booked myself for next years wedding season with the majority of them being in Washington, I found a new local coffee shop, AND I EVEN BOUGHT AN UMBRELLA. Sure some days I wake up really missing the avocado toast from Middle Way Cafe, but let me tell you another secret. Avocados are way better in the states than they are in Alaska..
I can’t tell you why Im writing this, I think in part I want other people to do the same. To take a leap into the complete unknown, to try something new. Sure some days are tough, and Im beyond lucky to have a partner that I got to go on this crazy adventure with who supports me in all my stupid decisions. Like moving 2,260 miles away from our friends and family, and tagging along. Maybe I just want to put it out on the internet so I know it’s real.
I guess all Im trying to say to you is this: Stop being scared, YOURE FREAKING MAGIC DARLING
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